Who am I....continued

I posted yesterday about how, we tend to concern ourselves to much with what others think of us, or how they define us. In addition we also create a false image of how we see ourselves or how we think others see us. This image becomes how we try to live our lives. But to live authentically, we must live from the center (spirit) of who we really are. What desires has God placed in our hearts. How does God see us or what does he call us too.

However, if you also have a false image of who God is, then you also will find yourself motivated by untruth and lost. In other words you will find yourself frustrated by the very faith or beliefs you are trying to live by.

This is where, I found myself. There was a part of myself, that I was not able to acknowledge and still hold to my beliefs. I found myself in a losing battle and living a very frustrated and conflicted life. However in my dedication, I was willing to make this sacrifice, because after all wasn't it the right thing to do. This cycle ended only due to anxiety and other physical and emotional ways this repression produced. Looking back I am truly thankful that God did not allow me to remain in this Hell, my beliefs had produced.

John McNeill puts it best when he says, " A healthy psychology produces a healthy theology, and a healthy theology produces a healthy psychology. " The opposite of course being an unhealthy theology produces and unhealthy psychology. My problem wasn't God, it was how I saw God.

When a person's faith is too small or fragile to face Real Life and the stuggles and fears a person needs to transcend, then it is not real faith. When a person's beliefs or faith produces fear, shame and guilt, it comes from a source other than God.

Simply put, God is Love! Anything else is not God!

I have since been able to accept the person I am. I am able to love myself, because I understand and accept God's love for me. God makes no mistakes. I am not perfect, but I am unique. I am on a journey of growth. God has no problem with whom I love, but God does take issue with who I hate or Judge.



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